Introverted Extroverts' Skills
内向者的外向技巧
Hey there, I'm a bit of an introvert who prefers observing over expressing. Whenever I attend large events or parties, I tend to feel uneasy and understand that my quietness can make others uncomfortable. So, I always try to create some noise to show my unity with the environment. I even enjoy being alone at night to contemplate the meaning of life, and I love sleeping because it allows me to continue thinking in my dreams. Over the years, I've made some interesting observations:
People who talk a lot and quickly may not understand what they're saying.
Speaking can be like playing a game of hot potato, where the goal is to pass the speaking turn to someone else.
Sometimes, people's speech can be a way of filling the meeting space with noise, without necessarily having any meaning.
Speaking is a way of showing support and participation and can be a redemption for the meeting's host.
Helping others exit a social conversation is an unspoken rule.
There are creative ways to save oneself, such as chatting on the phone or sending messages, hiding in the bathroom, constantly eating, going outside to absorb fresh air, standing in line at the bar to get drinks for others, taking notes in one's seat, or standing next to someone who talks a lot.
It's important to understand the purpose of every social activity and not blindly follow along.
Despite all this, I still enjoy being part of the extroverted world. Why? Because everyone is a mix of introverted and extroverted traits, although one side will dominate. When I was a child, I didn't like to talk because I was shy, afraid of stuttering, and didn't want to speak. However, after receiving perfect scores on personal presentations in college, I started giving speeches, lectures, and having conversations until now.
So, how can introverts handle social situations?
Be honest about your introverted personality and share it with others.
Empathize with the here-and-now needs of those around you.
Be curious about others; this should be your strength.
Use what you observe as a topic of conversation.
If you want to speak, raise your hand; otherwise, it's like trying to cross a street without a working traffic light.
Be comfortable with your own silence, or others will feel uncomfortable with you.
Find an extrovert to be with and let them take the lead.
Find a suitable role or position in the activity, such as helping with the barbecue, greeting guests, or finding another introverts to chat with. You might even attract others to join in.
For me, extroverts' skills can be improved through practice, but they are merely lubricants for interpersonal relationships. I am still an introvert who absorbs energy in a solitary space.
Being a mix of introverted and extroverted traits is a gift from above, allowing me to observe and express myself in a continuous cycle of self-improvement.
嘿，我是一个内向的人，喜欢观察胜过表达。每次参加大型活动或聚会前，总会感到不安。因为我知道我的安静会给周围的人带来不适的情绪。为了表达团结，我会制造一些声浪。在深夜独处时，我会思考人生问题，因为我喜欢在梦中继续思考。这些年来，我发现了一些有趣的观察：
说话多且快的人未必明白自己在说什么。
说话就像玩接龙游戏，有时候只需顺利过渡，把话题转交给下一个人。
有些人的说话只是为了填充会议的气氛，而不是为了传递信息或表达意义。
说话是表达支持和参与的方式，也是会议主持者的救赎。
帮助别人退出社交对话已成为一种潜规则。
自救的方法可以很有创意，如拿着手机聊天或发短信、躲在厕所里、不断进食、去外面呼吸新鲜空气、在酒吧排队替别人拿酒水、在自己的座位上写笔记、或站在多话的人旁边等等。
明确每次社交活动的目的，不要盲目跟随。
虽然如此，我仍然享受着外向的世界。为什么？因为每个人都是内外兼备的，虽然有一面性格会更主导。小时候，我不喜欢讲话，因为我害羞、害怕口齿不清、不想说话。直到我大学时的一次个人报告，拿了一次又一次的满分后，我开始展开至今的演讲、讲课和对话。
那么作为一个内向的人，在社交场合应该怎么做呢？
坦率地分享自己的内向性格。
理解在场人士的心理需求。
对他人充满好奇心，这应该是你的长处。
利用你所观察到的事物作为话题。
如果要发言，请举手。否则，就像十字路口的红绿灯坏了一样，你永远无法通过。
对自己的沉默感到舒适，否则，别人会和你一样感到不舒服。
找一个外向且爱说话的人一起，让他发挥长处。
在活动中找到适合你的角色或位置，如帮助烧烤、接待客人或找一个与你一样内向的人聊天。说不定，你们会吸引其他人一起参与。
对于我这样的内向人来说，外向的技巧可以通过练习来提高，但最后只是人际关系上的润滑剂。我仍然是一个内向的人，在一个人的空间里吸收能量。
内外兼备，不论哪一面是主导，都是上天赐给你的礼物。这让你可以在观察和表达之间来回循环，不断进步。
Love. David
Comments